Tuesday, April 24, 2001

Chapter 26

~~~~OOO~~~OOO~~~~
Chapter 26
"Emmett. Jesus, do you think you could slice the ball anymore than that?" Edward laughed as he watched his brother's golf ball go straight for about fifty yards before it took a sharp turn to the right.
"Shut the fuck up, Edward. Not all of us are married to the female version of Tiger Woods you know. Now, help me fix my fucking swing," Emmett grumbled.
Shaking his head while trying to keep from laughing, loudly, at his younger brother, he walked forward and adjusted Emmett's grip on the driver in his hands before standing behind him and moving his hips to square him up behind the ball. "Try that," Edward instructed.
He moved out of Emmett's back swing and then chuckled when Emmett hit the ball straight down the middle of the driving range before it bounced by the 230 yard marker.
"Holy shit!" Emmett crowed and he hurriedly placed another ball on the tee. When he looked up and saw Edward shaking his head, he gave him a calculated look and then asked, "How many yards did Bella add to your drive, Mr. Smugass?"
Edward harrumphed, and then realized Emmett hadn't said anything else. When he looked at him, Emmett crooked his eyebrow expectantly. "Fine, about 40 yards. Happy now?" Edward grumbled and then, well, he couldn't help but smile because he could remember, vividly in all matter-of-fact, just how Isabella had coaxed him to get those 40 yards.
He even groaned a bit when he imagined how it had felt to have her body pressed up tightly against his back as she wrapped her arms around his waist and held his hands in the right grip. He could practically feel the way her nipples brushed back and forth as she moved his hips into the proper position. He'd happily endure more lessons like that; it didn't even matter to him if it helped his golf game any.
He watched Emmett hit another almost picture perfect drive and amended his previous thought. As long as he could still beat Em, Jasper, and Alec he was happy.
Hell, he'd even accidentally on purpose develop a hitch in his swing if it meant more lessons from his delectable wife.
Edward and Emmett hit golf balls for over an hour, talking and enjoying each other's company. It was a gorgeous fall night and because it was now the beginning of October, there was a definite chill in the air as soon as the sun started to set. Isabella was helping Nonna and Renée at church and Edward had figured it was a great opportunity to spend some time away from the office with Emmett, just the two of them.
There wasn't any question that their relationship was in a much better place; hell, it was in a different stratosphere from where it was just a few short months ago. Edward rediscovered all those wonderful things about his brother that he chose to ignore over the years; his sense of humor, even if it did tip toward juvenile and crude from time to time, his ability to get to the heart of a problem without beating around the bush, and his unwavering sense of family and a loyalty that few could match.
For Emmett, it was like meeting his brother for the first time. He was amazed to discover how laid back Edward could be. It wasn't that big of a stretch to imagine how difficult it was to always be on guard, to always be afraid of saying too much or showing too much. Now that Edward didn't have to do that any longer, he most definitely wasn't the Iceman everyone had thought he was for so long.
Emmett found himself mesmerized more often than not at the office. He watched Edward with a new appreciation, marveling at how commanding he was, without seeming overbearing. How he could make decisions in the blink of an eye and never second-guess himself. How - now that he had let his guard down - he seemed to be thriving and how everyone seemed to admire and love him even more because of it.
It would have been easy, he supposed, to be jealous of Edward, but there wasn't a jealous bone to be found in his body, not even a hint of one. Edward was born to be in charge and now that he'd opened himself up and relied on the input of others, well, there was nothing he couldn't do.
Even outside the business aspect of things, the relationship between the two of them was thriving. In the few weeks that had passed since Edward had taken the steps to heal their family, things had decidedly taken a turn for the better. More times than Emmett could count, he'd come home only to find that Edward and Bella had taken the kids either out to dinner, or to the park, or even to the bookstore, just because they felt like it. Or, he would come home and find Edward and Jack in the basement playing the Wii or playing catch in the backyard while Rose and Bella visited in the kitchen with Emma playing happily at their feet. There were even a few times when their parents had joined them as well resulting in impromptu family dinners.
Emmett thought it was all...really fucking great to be perfectly honest.
He knew things were still strained between Edward and their dad, more so than with their mother. If he was being one hundred percent honest, he was more than a bit upset and hurt and disillusioned when it came to his mom and dad and he was struggling with how to deal with that. Hearing everything that Edward had to live through, only to be taken in and summarily ignored again, well, it tore at his heart in ways he couldn't even begin to understand.
Both men noticed that their buckets were empty at about the same time and after putting their golf clubs away in their bags, they walked toward the parking lot.
"Beer?" Emmett asked with a lift of his chin after he'd shut the hatch on the back of the SUV.
"Absolutely," Edward answered immediately and set his clubs in his trunk as well.
Isabella wasn't due to be done helping at the church for a few hours yet and he'd much rather spend that time with Emmett than being at home by himself. It made him pause when he realized how quickly things had changed. For so long he'd tried to find any and all excuse to keep from being at home, alone with Isabella, now it was as though he never wanted to leave, or at the very least, be very far away from her and sure as hell not for very long.
Edward followed Emmett to a bar that was on their way home from the driving range and they both ordered a beer and decided to split a pizza as soon as they sat down. Once the waitress left them their beers, Emmett tipped his toward his brother. "Here's to many more nights hanging out. You're kinda not an ass and pretty fucking cool when you want to be."
"Gee, thanks," Edward said in response and smirked at him across the table.
Both men clinked their bottles together, took a long drink of their beer, and sat for a few moments in a very comfortable silence. Edward tried not to think of the fact that not too long ago he wouldn't be caught dead sitting in a bar with his brother and Emmett tried not to think about the fact that he'd wished he could do something as simple as hang out and drink beer with his brother for longer than he could remember.
The two talked until their pizza came and then they dug in. Every now and then Emmett would make a comment about the baseball game that was playing on the television, but mostly they just ate. Finally, when all but two pieces of pizza were gone, Emmett sat back in the booth and regarded his brother before saying quite softly, "This was...really nice."
Edward had started to pick up his beer to take a drink, but at hearing Em's words, he set the bottle back on the table and looked across at him. "I'm sorry we haven't spent more time together," Edward said, and then began nervously peeling at the label on his beer bottle.
It had been a few weeks since the dinner at his house and though he felt so much better that everything was out in the open, he realized he and Emmett hadn't really had a chance to talk about everything either. His eyes pinched and he could feel himself frown as he remembered how devastated Emmett had been once he'd told them all of his time in Ireland. Emmett wasn't one to hide his emotions, never had been, so Edward was well aware of how much it had hurt Em to hear what he'd lived with for so long.
"Well, I'm just sorry that it took so fucking long to talk about it all. Damn, Edward," Emmett said as he struggled to find the words he'd been desperately trying to say for weeks now. "I just...I wish...fuck," he grunted and then blew out a frustrated breath. "I really fucking wish there was a way to go back and start over, you know? I hate, fucking hate, all the time that we missed. I hate that no one knew what you'd been through. I hate that Grandfather practically stole you away from us before we even had a chance to get to know you. I really, really fucking hate that Mom and Dad didn't try harder to help you," he finished in a tight voice that only underlined how hard it still was for him to come to grips with everything that had happened, both before Edward left Ireland and then after he'd come to Chicago.
Edward stared at him and tried to come up with a response. Finally he offered what little he could. "Em, what's done is done so there isn't any point in dwelling on it any longer. We've all made mistakes, and the only thing we can do now is try to move past them. I'm not sure any of us can...forget...but we can accept and make peace. Like you said, we've wasted a lot of time being angry with one another, and not even really knowing why. I don't know about you, but I'm really fucking exhausted from being so pissed off all the damn time and you have to admit, I'm a much more pleasant fellow to be around these days, yes?"
"God, isn't that the fucking truth?" Emmett grinned and then shook his head. "Are you really okay? I mean, you seem to be and you and Bella...I don't even know how to explain how happy you two look, but you know, I mean...you can talk to me...if you need to...about anything," he stammered out.
Edward felt his heart flutter and he had to adjust himself on the seat of the booth because the moment his mind wandered to his wife, he got hard, just like he always did these days. He could also tell he was sporting the same stupid, goofy grin, just like he always did whenever Isabella came up in conversation.
Hmmm, he thought, maybe the damn angel has a point with all his sighing and ogling...not that he would ever, EVER, admit that out loud. The being was annoying as all get out on a normal basis; there was no telling what Seth would do if he were to ever find out that Edward didn't mind anywhere near as much as he pretended in regard to the angel's appreciation of his wife.
"I am happy," Edward said somewhat dreamily not even stopping to mind that he probably sounded like a pansy ass.
"It's about fucking time, and you deserve it more than anyone," Emmett answered him immediately.
Edward didn't comment on that because he didn't really know what to say. They ordered another round of beers and when the waitress dropped them off at the table, Edward made sure to tell her thank you. He got a flash of a memory from years ago, of being rude to the poor flight attendant that happened to be working when he and Isabella had flown to Italy for their honeymoon and he cringed at the memory.
God he really had been quite the insufferable ass.
Emmett raised his eyebrow at Edward when he saw him shake his head. "What?"
"How in the world did all of you put up with me for all those years?" Edward asked incredulously. "Just thinking back on how I acted and some of the things I said, my God, Em, I was such a bastard."
Emmett slammed his hand on the table and then took a deep breath to keep from saying something he would regret later. "Edward," he said then snapped his mouth shut so he could exhale out of his nose. This time his voice was much calmer when he began to speak. "I won't blow sunshine up your ass and tell you that you were a peach to be around, but honestly, you weren't as bad as you think you were. On top of that, we all got used to it over time anyway."
He took a breath and he could tell Edward was about to disagree, but really, Emmett couldn't stand for Edward to castigate himself any more. He just...couldn't. "God damn it, no, Edward. You did the best you could, considering all the bullshit you were dealing with. None of us tried to help you, so it's a wonder you even bothered talking to us at all," he finished and then hung his head.
"Ah, fuck, Emmett," Edward huffed. "I'm sorry," and when Emmett glared at him, he lifted his hands to tell him to wait. "I didn't mean to bring this up and ruin a great night; we just haven't had much time to talk is all."
Emmett leaned his back against the booth and looked at his brother for a long moment before he said, "I know. I needed some time to let everything kind of sink in, you know? I hope you don't think I just blew everything off. I guess it wouldn't surprise me if you did, but, Christ, Ed, that was a hell of a lot to think about."
"No, I didn't think that," Edward stated. "I know you have questions, ask them, and then we can clear the air and be done." When Emmett's jaw dropped, Edward snickered at him and then rolled his eyes. "Really, Em, it's fine. Ask what you want to know."
So he did...for a good solid hour Emmett peppered Edward with question after question. Some were rather out of left field, some were right on the money and made Edward cringe, but he'd told Emmett to ask whatever he wanted to know and he meant it. By the time they paid their check and walked out to their cars, the two men were even closer than they were when they'd first arrived.
Edward thought over all the questions during his fifteen minute drive home but the moment he turned down the street to his house, the only thing he could think about was Isabella. He had hardly seen her at all during the day because they were both busy with meetings and then she'd left early to go meet Renée and Nonna. He really fucking missed her as crazy as that sounded, but he didn't much care.
He parked the car in the garage and hurried inside the house, feeling his heart rate spike as soon as he'd closed the door behind him. She wasn't anywhere to be found downstairs so he quickly raced up the stairs. He knew she was home, her car was in the garage, and when he turned left at the top of the stairs he heard the shower as he got closer to their bedroom door. He started taking his shirt off before he'd even opened the bedroom door and in the blink of an eye had gotten completely undressed, leaving a trail of clothing, shoes, and even keys and cell phone on the floor in his wake. He didn't care, the only thing he was focused on was the fact that she was naked and he wanted her.
He always wanted her. Every second of every day it seemed like and if that was supposed to bother him...well, it didn't...not even a little bit.
Quietly he opened the door and was inundated with steam, which was just fine with him because it allowed him to enter unnoticed. He could make out her silhouette, though just barely, but what he saw was enough to make him harder than he was already. She was humming as she stood under the water, with her head tipped back and he watched, transfixed, as the water cascaded over her body. He watched her as long as he could stand it, which really wasn't that long at all and when she turned around and hung her head beneath the streaming water, he opened the door to the shower and stepped in behind her.
"I was wondering how long you were going to wait," she told him as soon as he pressed his body against hers.
She lifted her head up and then shifted her weight so he was aligned perfectly with her body. She fit perfectly in front of him as was apparent when his hardened length was nestled right up against her ass. His hands slid around her waist and then covered her breasts. She lolled her head backward, tilting her head to the side so that he could kiss up and down the side of her neck.
"I missed you today," he whispered as he flicked her pulse point with his tongue.
She relaxed against him even more, enjoying the feel of his hands as they traveled over her body and the way the warm water softly pelted her skin. "Mmmm, missed you, too," she said in a raspy voice and her breath caught in her throat when he pinched a nipple, rolling the sensitive flesh between his fingers.
"I need you, now," he told her as he spun her around and then lifted her up. She immediately wrapped her legs around his waist and when her back touched the cool marble of the shower, she barely noticed. All she could see and feel was him.
He was so hard, so ready, and apparently so was she because she slid down his length with no trouble at all. He dipped his hips and then thrust one time, hissing in pleasure as she settled around him.
"Oooh...Edward," she breathed out, caught by surprise at the warmth that spread through her body the instant he was inside of her.
"Kiss me," he told her and growled just a bit, though the sound echoed off the walls of the shower, when she reached up and wrapped her arm around his neck and pulled his head down to hers.
Their mouths fused together with her top lip between both of his. For just a moment, they both stilled, breathing the same breath in the steamy shower. It had only been hours since they'd seen each other, but you would have thought it had been days or weeks the way they craved each other. Isabella slid her lips back and forth across his, relishing how they felt and tasted, and then let her tongue drag across his bottom one. Slowly and gently, which was the exact opposite of what her mind and body were telling her, she pressed her tongue into his mouth, groaning softly in the back of her throat as his taste exploded in her mouth. She kissed him until she had her fill, well actually it was more like until she saw stars because she wasn't breathing and then moved from his lips to the spot where his neck and his shoulders met. As she lapped up the water, she wondered how it could taste like him.
His fingers kneaded the muscles in her ass as he pressed her against the wall of the shower. He dipped his head so he could reciprocate her actions and when he did, he could feel her breasts firmly against his chest, especially her nipples.
Lifting one hand from her ass, he covered a breast with his hand and then rubbed his thumb across the sensitive peak. As soon as he did so, he felt her clench around him and the flood of heat that suddenly appeared he knew had nothing to do with the warm water of the shower and everything to do with him.
God how he loved the way she responded to him, the way he knew exactly how to touch her, to move inside of her to elicit those sweet and fucking sexy little whimpers and moans that he knew as well as he knew her voice. He knew that she loved to have the skin on in the inside of hipbones rubbed in a circle, how she loved to have the spot behind her ear sucked just right, but she didn't like him to kiss her earlobe. He knew, for some unfathomable reason, her left breast was more sensitive than her right, and that without fail, she would come, and come hard, if he breathed in her ear at the same time his fingers rubbed her clit.
He knew her...mind, body, heart, and soul and she knew him the same way and it was the best fucking feeling in the whole world.
Well, besides being inside of her and as soon as he had that thought, he began to move. Slow and steady, with long, deep strokes, he moved.
"Ah...God, so good," she breathed against his neck as she clung to him.
Grunting, he said, "Fuck, yes."
He rolled his hips and she squeezed him tightly, both around his neck and around his length, deep inside of her. Her nails scratched his scalp when she ran her hands through his hair and he sucked in a breath through his nose.
"I fucking love when you do that. Do it again," he told her as he bent his head down and breathed in her ear.
When she did it again, he felt himself grow even harder inside of her.
"Faster, Edward. I'm so close," she panted in his ear.
"Kiss me again, Beautiful," he demanded.
She did as he asked and as soon as their tongues twisted and twirled he started pumping faster. His legs burned but he didn't care. He heard the telltale hitch in her breathing and the squeak that always meant she was close.
"Come, baby." He wanted, needed, to feel her come around him before he let go, but it was getting harder to hang on. He spread his legs just a bit more and tilted her forward just enough so that he hit that perfect spot deep inside of her. When she threw her head backward, stretching her elegant neck, he knew she would let go any moment. "That's it, come for me."
Her walls fluttered and spasmed as her orgasm flowed through her body. He cupped her ass in his hands and thrust, one time, inside of her and then felt his own orgasm, shivering as he came hard in a few powerful bursts. Limply, she sagged against him when he pulled her up and wrapped his arms around her.
"Love you," she murmured in his ear and then voiced her displeasure when he slid from her body.
"Love you, too," he said with a grin once she was standing up, though a bit wobbly, when he put her down. He kissed her forehead and then her lips, saying sweetly, "I love coming home to you like that. I hate when we're not together, but that certainly makes up for it."
They finished their shower, taking time to wash each other's hair and body and by the time they got out, the water had turned cold. She giggled and rolled her eyes at him when they walked out of the bathroom and she took in the mess he'd left on the floor.
"What? I heard you in the shower. You know I can never resist when you're naked," he told her with a sexy smile and then picked his things off the floor.
Once they'd dressed, or not dressed for bed as the case was, they crawled into bed.
"How was your evening with Emmett?" she asked once she'd found her happy place on his chest.
He didn't stop running his fingers through her hair, but he didn't answer right away either. After a few minutes he sighed. "It was really great. We got a chance to really talk about everything, got some shit straightened out, so it was good. I just...I wish," he stumbled and she immediately raised her head and turned, resting her chin on his chest while she looked at him.
"What, sweetheart?" she questioned, though not with a hint of anything other than encouragement.
He'd done so well dealing with everything, so much so, she had a hard time not waiting for the other shoe to drop. They'd spent a lot of time talking, while they were curled up in bed, sitting outside on the deck, or when they cooked dinner together, about everything. He was still very angry and hurt, and she didn't blame him in the least; she was, too, and he didn't blame her either. It was a lot to process, a lot to come to terms with and they were taking it day by day. They didn't talk about his past or his parents every day, but each knew if something was bothering them, they could talk about it. It was very freeing to know that they had that level of trust with each other and it only cemented their bond to each other even more.
"I really fucking hate that Emmett is mad at Carlisle and Esme. I mean, I understand it, but I don't like it. I just want all this shit to be behind us, you know? Now that everything is out there, I want to leave the past in the past," he huffed and then adjusted them so they were lying face to face on their sides.
"Edward, you know that just because you've forgiven Carlisle and Esme doesn't mean everyone can forget what happened. They have their own failures to deal with and it's not easy, especially for someone like Carlisle. Forgiveness doesn't automatically make things all better, it just makes it easier to go forward," she told him while she ran her fingers through his hair.
"I am still so mad at myself for hurting you the way I did," he told her in a pained voice. "I wouldn't have blamed you if you hadn't forgiven me. I don't deserve you, but I'm so fucking grateful you did."
Forcefully, she held his face in her small but very strong hands and then rolled over so she was on top of him. Looking down into his eyes, she said in a fierce voice that was full of all the love she had for him, "You do deserve me, Edward, just like I deserve you. We were meant to be together, don't you know that? There isn't anyone that could make me as happy as I am or feel as loved as I do but you. You say I am your reason, but don't you know by now you're my reason, too, my everything? There is no me without you..." Her chin quivered but she kept staring into his eyes, willing him to understand the depth of her love for him and her unwavering belief in what she'd said.
"Ah, fuck, Isabella," he groaned and then crushed her body to his. His mouth was on hers instantly and he kissed her until all the chaotic thoughts he had calmed so he could focus solely on her.
When he pulled back he pushed her hair back over her shoulder with one hand and with the other traced the friendship bracelet on her wrist. "I do think we were meant to be together, but I still have such a hard time forgiving myself for hurting you the way I did. I wasted so much time, love, time that I'd give anything to have back so that I could love you the way I've always wanted to. Time that we could have spent starting our family or time that we could have just spent together. I'll never get that back, no matter how happy I am now."
He really hadn't meant for the conversation to take the turn it did, but he couldn't stop it now. Of course he lived with those thoughts every day, they never went away, and he didn't think they ever would. In all honesty, he wasn't sure he ever wanted them to. He hated living with the constant reminder of all the pain he'd caused her, but it helped him make damn sure to appreciate every day with her all the more.
He really didn't think there was too much wrong with that.
"Oh, Edward," she sighed in a much softer tone. She scooted down his chest and he tucked her head beneath his chin. Slowly she began to run her fingers through the hair on his chest and then quietly said, "We've been given a second chance and I, for one, am not going to waste it by living in the past. You have to let it go, sweetheart. You didn't hurt me on purpose and I know that, especially now. We have our whole lives together; let's focus on that, okay? Neither one of us knows what the future looks like, but I know as long as I'm with you, it doesn't matter."
Edward couldn't help but squeeze her tightly and he tried with all his might not to let her see just how much her words had affected him, only because if she asked, he would tell her everything and he wasn't sure that was such a good idea. Somehow he figured there were rules against that or some shit, and he most definitely did not want to go about breaking any. He figured it was much better to be safe than sorry in this particular instance.
After another moment, he slid her off his chest so she could roll over and he could wrap his arms around her. He pulled her to him, and then sighed into her hair. "I love you, Isabella. I'll love you forever," he told her softly.
"I know. I love you, too, and we'll always be a part of each other," she said right before she drifted off to sleep.
He closed his eyes, letting her scent and her love surround them and as he followed her in sleep, he got that warm feeling he always did when the angel was hovering.
"Thank you," Edward murmured and immediately felt a kiss to his forehead. "Damn angel," he barely whispered before falling completely asleep.
He missed the look of supreme satisfaction and love as well as the twinkle in Seth's eyes before he disappeared, leaving his two favorite humans wrapped in each other's arms.
~~~~OOO~~~OOO~~~~
"Donna, will you check with the caterers and make sure they'll have everything set up in time?" Edward asked and then smiled as he released the button on the intercom on his desk.
"Are you nervous?" the angel smirked from the corner.
Edward snorted and rolled his eyes but didn't comment. Instead he finished what he was working on and then looked at Seth.
"The only thing I'm nervous about is the fact that she's going to kill me for making such a big deal about this," Edward said and then literally cringed when he thought about all the different ways the afternoon could go.
Seth laughed loudly and Edward raised his eyebrows at him. "It wasn't that funny," he mumbled and tried like hell not to smile himself.
For the past few weeks Edward had been working with Jasper to change the business plan for CP and make sure everything was legal and air tight. It's not like Isabella didn't know he was naming her his successor, but he'd purposely not mentioned anything about any sort of formal recognition ceremony. It was bit macabre he supposed, to make a celebration out of the fact that he was letting everyone know what would happen when he died, but no one besides himself and the annoying being in the corner knew it would become necessary sooner rather than later.
His sole purpose in making such a big deal out of it was to show her that everyone, not just him and the family, had the utmost faith in her as a businesswoman, not just as his wife. She'd more than proven herself over the past few weeks as her project with Emmett continued to garner countrywide attention and praise from all directions.
He'd said it before and he would continue saying it over and over again, he was so fucking proud of her he could hardly stand it. She'd thrived with each success and at night when they were at home talking about their days, she had idea after idea that she couldn't wait to share with him and he loved every fucking minute of it. She was the smartest person he knew, and he could, and often did, spend hours just listening to her talk. Not just about work either, but everything: sports, current events, popular culture and serious topics like religion and politics, too. She was most passionate when she talked about her work with the after school program and her next project was going to be a literacy campaign to help the programs like the one she volunteered in.
Yep, he was proud as a peacock and didn't try to hide it in the least.
"You invited her family as well as Carlisle and Esme I take it?" Seth questioned, even though he already knew the answer.
"Yes, and you damn well know I did, too," Edward remarked.
The angel chuckled again. "Eddie, you just make it so easy sometimes. You would really think by now you would know better."
"Hmph," Edward snorted and then took a moment to look through the papers Jasper had left him one more time.
Seth let him be, choosing to instead think about the past few weeks and how far Edward had come since he'd finally told his family everything. There were good days and bad of course; it would be wholly unreasonable to assume or expect that there wouldn't be instances when the residual hurt and anger Edward still had would come out, but it was less than Seth had anticipated. There were moments of awkwardness toward Carlisle and Esme and there were uncomfortable discussions with Jasper and Alec when they had questions, but all in all, things were progressing better than he'd ever hoped.
When Edward and Isabella had the discussion about children, it had...well for lack of a better way of saying it...it had shocked the shit out of him. The others of his kind had taken great pleasure at his utter surprise. Even Gideon hadn't been able to hide his mirth as his ice blue eyes twinkled more than all the stars in the sky. Seth of course knew that Edward had thought of having or not having children with Isabella, they'd discussed it plenty of times, but the fact that he'd been so ready to talk about it the day after revealing everything to his family and friends had completely blindsided him.
Like he'd commented many, many times, Edward didn't do anything halfway.
When he questioned him about it at the first opportunity, the reason Edward had given him had rendered him speechless, a feat that was becoming more commonplace with each passing day, much to his consternation. He'd told him, very simply, that when, not if, because he'd given up using that word some time ago, his time was up, Isabella wouldn't be alone. The support system she and any child they would be blessed enough to have was so big and so strong, he was sure they would see her through even the darkest of days and times.
"She loves you too much to kill you my friend, and we all know the lovely Isabella can't hold a grudge, at all," he grinned, showing his perfect teeth.
"No, she really can't, but Lord knows I've been on her bad side. I love Isabella when she's feisty, though not particularly when it's directed at me," Edward answered with a grin of his own.
Of course his grin was for a much different reason, at least it better be. Picturing his wife when she got all riled up about something never failed to turn him on, so the cheeky angel better not be implying the same thing or there would be...well, he would be in trouble.
Seth smiled at Edward and then in a more serious tone said, "Edward Anthony, come sit for a minute. We have some time before the others get here and I want to talk to you."
Edward's stomach tightened but he did as he was asked and took a seat on the couch, looking at Seth with a terrified look on his face, one which caused the angel to snigger.
"Edward, you look like you're going to be sick! Come now, do you really think I would do anything to ruin Isabella's day? We haven't had much time to talk lately that's all," Seth told him with a slight shake of his head. Once Edward took a deep breath, he went on. "How are you feeling about everyone being together again now that they've all had some time to digest everything you told them?"
"Ah, I think it will be good. Things are still kind of strained with Mother and Carlisle but with everyone else, things are really good," he said, sounding very much at peace.
Seth prodded a bit because Edward did indeed sound relaxed, well for him any rate, and asked, "Do you think you'll ever acknowledge Carlisle as your father? It seems that no matter how angry and hurt you were by your adoptive parents, Esme has always been Mother but Carlisle has never been Father."
Edward inhaled deeply through his nose and then leaned forward, resting his forearms on his legs and then turned to look at Seth. He'd often wondered the same thing, many times in fact, especially as he and Isabella spent more and more time talking and even more so when the subject of children came up, as it did frequently these days. "Maybe, if there was enough time," he answered Seth. "I don't exactly have a positive reaction when I hear the word father, you know?"
"Considering what you and Isabella have been discussing of late, don't you think you might want to try?" the all-knowing angel asked with a raised eyebrow.
The angel was right, as he always was when he tried to make Edward admit something he didn't want to and Edward didn't like it any more in this case than he had in any of the others either.
Damn it all.
Edward didn't say anything but he didn't need to for Seth to know he'd gotten his point across. "Look, Edward, I'm certainly not going to tell you that you have to start calling Carlisle Daddy and go out and buy him one of those obnoxious t-shirts that proclaim him the 'World's Greatest Father' but it is something to think about just the same. If you are looking for positive role models for how a father should act, you don't have to look any farther than Charlie or Emmett. Both epitomize what the word means and you couldn't do much better than to emulate either one of them."
"You got that right. Charlie and Emmett are both amazing fathers. Maybe you need to have the right genes or some shit to be a good father, that would explain Carlisle I suppose, considering we all know Grandfather would never win any father of the year awards," Edward huffed.
"That is certainly true, Edward, but humans are, for the most part, very flawed beings. Your Grandfather made his own mistakes, ones that though Carlisle didn't intentionally set to repeat, he did nonetheless. However, the thing that separates your Grandfather and Carlisle the most is the fact that Carlisle is well aware of the mistakes he's made and is truly remorseful for them," the patient angel said in a sincere voice.
Edward made some sort of sound that was a cross between a snort and a scoff before saying, "Well, he's certainly acting like he's trying hard, I'll give him that much."
"He's doing more than acting, my friend, and you acting like a spoiled brat about it doesn't become you in the least, you know," Seth remarked with a very pointed glance.
Properly chastised, Edward sat back. "Twenty years of behavior is kind of hard to change overnight so cut me a damn break, okay. And, I know that tone, so why don't you tell me what you mean by that comment instead of reprimanding me like I was a child."
Seth let Edward's belligerence slide, only because it was done more out of reflex than anything and because he did have a point. Edward had a stubborn streak that was a mile wide and he'd fallen back on it and used it as a defense mechanism for more than half his life. No one, not even Seth, could expect him to completely let go of that this quickly. The only person that he didn't use it with was the lovely Isabella and that was because, well, she was Isabella.
Seth arranged himself in the chair and then looked at his charge. He had been waiting to bring this next topic up until just the right time and considering the turn the conversation had taken, he figured that time had come.
After Edward had shared his secrets and his painful past with his family all those weeks ago, Seth had left him in the very capable hands of his wife and instead, spent some time observing Carlisle and Esme on their way home. He was most glad he did because although he was certain that both Carlisle and Esme were sorry for what they had and hadn't done in regard to Edward, witnessing their naked and raw remorse was at once both moving and hard to watch. If he'd had any doubt, and he admitted to having a little, about Carlisle's sincerity, he didn't after hearing and seeing what he had. He knew Edward needed to know, too, so that he could truly open himself up to the new relationship he was trying to build with the man that was his father in every sense of the word.
"Edward, you know by now that I can do many things so it shouldn't come as a surprise to you that after you had talked to your family, I spent some time observing Carlisle and Esme after they left your house. Let me assure you my friend, there is nothing either of them want more than to earn your love and forgiveness and to be allowed to be the parents they should have been from the very beginning," Seth told him.
Edward sucked in a sharp breath and then ran his fingers through his hair as he tried to keep his composure. He wasn't sure why the angel's words affected him so much, but they did and his heart was positively pounding in his chest. Actually he knew exactly why he was reacting the way he was; Seth had never lied to him, he couldn't, so he knew that what he just told him was the truth, a truth Edward desperately wanted to believe.
"What did you hear?" Edward questioned, and it tore at Seth's heart to hear the vulnerability that Edward tried so hard to keep buried in his voice.
Seth closed his eyes, though he didn't need to because his kind had perfect recall, but he did it just the same and was immediately transported backward. Keeping his eyes closed, he began to speak in the quietest, gentlest voice Edward had heard yet and Edward stared, transfixed, as his guide began to speak.
"If there was ever a time I wished I could read minds, it was then, Edward Anthony, because neither one spoke much during the drive home, but you could certainly tell they were both deep in thought. The anguish and the guilt just poured out of them, so much so it was like they were inside an impenetrable bubble. They didn't even touch each other, which you know is not the norm for your parents. Carlisle asked Esme one time during the entire drive if she was okay, but she was so overcome with everything she couldn't even answer him, she just nodded her head.
"When they arrived at their house, neither one made an attempt to exit the car and go in the house, they were just...numb. Finally Carlisle prodded her to get out and they walked, silently, into the house and you could tell the moment they did so, the atmosphere changed. I can't really explain it but to say it was if the weight of all they'd done wrong suddenly surrounded them and they couldn't make it another step. They both collapsed on the floor, crying in each other's arms. Edward, please make no mistake, I know, more than anyone, perhaps even you, just how greatly they failed you, but I have never seen such anguish or remorse from two people as I did when they cried to each other. They do love you, more than you can probably imagine, and they are hurting and so very, very sorry. The last thing Carlisle told Esme, after she'd asked him how to earn your forgiveness was," and the angel repeated verbatim what he'd heard, "'We try, Es, every damn day, to be the parents we should have been all this time. Me more than you; you've always let him know how much you've loved him, even if he didn't acknowledge it. Me? I've squandered away twenty years that I can't ever get back, but I can make sure to embrace this second chance he's given me and I fully intend to do just that.'"
Seth looked into the shell-shocked look of his charge and smiled lovingly at him. "Edward, they love you, both of them. Carlisle has to learn to forgive himself so that he can move forward with you. You, my young and very stubborn friend, must learn to forgive yourself for hurting Isabella, as well. I know you love her, Isabella knows you do, too, but until you let go of that last bit of self-hatred you're clinging to, you won't be completely at peace. She's forgiven you, Edward, it's time to forgive yourself. Just like Carlisle must forgive himself in order to embrace, fully, the second chance you've given him. You don't have to forget your mistakes, you won't ever, but you do have to stop dwelling on them."
Edward sighed deeply, breathing in and out a few times and then pinched the bridge of his nose before turning to Seth. "I know," he said, and the angel was pleased as could be that the words weren't tinged with reticence, but instead a firm resolve to do just that. "I don't want Carlisle living everyday in the past. It's time for all of us to stop looking behind and focus on what's in front of us, though for some of us, the horizon is much shorter."
Seth didn't comment on that, because he couldn't. Anything he said would be a hollow platitude and he and Edward were way past them anyway. Trying to lighten the mood after the heavy conversation they'd just had because it was almost time for the others to arrive, the being said with a mischievous twinkle in his eye, "Well, if the lovely Isabella kills you for springing this impromptu get together on her, you won't have to wonder anymore when your time will be up, will you?"
"Ah, shit, you don't really think she's going to be that mad at me do you?" Edward squeaked and then swallowed convulsively.
It went without saying how much he really fucking hated when she was mad at him! It was something he avoided at all costs actually. That wasn't to say he didn't enjoy teasing her when he was in one of his moods just to see how far he could push her, but he certainly never got her angry on purpose. He was an idiot at times, but not even he was stupid enough to provoke her on purpose.
"Relax, Eddie, what's the worst she can do? You and I both know you don't ever mind when a bit of that Italian temper comes to light. Now, if I'm not mistaken, and you know I'm not ever wrong, it's time to head downstairs to the reception room and get ready for this long awaited presentation," the cheeky angel said with a shit-eating grin.
"It would help a whole fucking lot if you didn't seem to enjoy it when I screwed up so damn much," Edward grumbled as he stood up and put his suit jacket on.
"And deny myself one of my favorite pleasures? No way," Seth said before disappearing, though it would only be for a few minutes.
"Damn bossy, smart ass, annoying angel," Edward muttered as he stepped on the elevator to go down to the reception room and quickly said a prayer that Isabella didn't kill him.
Isabella walked into the reception room and when she noticed her parents and Nonna standing with Alice, Carlisle, and Esme, she knew something was up and she had a feeling she knew what it was. She should have known the second her assistant, Meredith, reminded her that she had blocked off her calendar from 2:00 on that something was going on, she just didn't think it would be this.
Her husband, she swore to herself and shook her head.
"Bambola!" Charlie said loudly when he noticed his daughter approaching. He was so damn proud of her he could hardly stand it, and he wanted everyone to know it, too.
"Dad," Isabella greeted him with a smile and then let herself be wrapped up in a tight hug.
"Now you listen to me, daughter of mine, no getting upset with Edward, you hear me? He really wanted to do this for you, it's important to him that everyone knows that you have his full support and faith, not because you're his wife but because you are qualified to run this show if it ever came down to it," Charlie told her in his no-nonsense way, though it was tinged with an overflowing amount of love and happiness.
Isabella felt any residual annoyance over today's events melt away and then nodded at her father. It went without saying the immense joy she got from watching the two most important men in her life bond the way they had and it was one she knew each treasured beyond measure. For her dad, he got the son, the partner in crime he'd always wanted and for her amazing husband, he got the acceptance and the guidance that he'd craved for so long from a man he looked up to more than anyone.
She made the rounds hugging and kissing her mom and Nonna, visiting with a very enthusiastic Alice and then catching up with Carlisle and Esme for a few minutes. She was quite surprised, and more than a little relieved she had to admit, at how easy it was to be at ease around Carlisle and Esme, though she figured a lot of that had to do with how Edward acted when he was around them. Of course when Esme looked like she did now, with a mother's beaming smile, it didn't hurt.
She turned around, knowing Edward had walked in. She couldn't help but giggle at how apprehensive he looked as he approached and she thought, for like half a second, to try to scowl at him, but she just couldn't do it. Stepping forward she immediately wrapped her arms around him and stood on her tiptoes to give him a full-on, lip-smacking kiss.
"Does that mean you're not mad at me, Beautiful?" he asked her as he kissed her forehead.
"I know this is important to you, so no, I'm not mad at you."
"Thank God," he breathed out exaggeratedly and then winked at her. "I was worried all damn day."
The formal part of the announcement passed and Isabella couldn't help but feel her heart soar as she listened to Edward extol on how capable she was. She listened to him say how Cullen Publishing was lucky to have her and how everyone from him down to the interns that worked part-time had the utmost faith in her abilities. It threatened to bring tears to her eyes, but more than that, she found that she stood up taller, straighter because she was proud to be thought of as so capable. The fact that Edward had so much faith in her made her happier than she could explain, though she had every intention of trying, numerous times, when they got home later.
Preferably when they were both naked.
A short time later, as she received congratulations from some of the department heads, Alec cornered her. "So, are you letting him off the hook for this little shindig?" he asked with a grin as he popped an hors d'ouerve in his mouth.
"I suppose I'll let it slide," she chuckled back at him.
"Seriously, Bella, this is a big deal. I know it seems a little...dark I guess...to be celebrating something that would only take place if something happened to Edward, but if you think about it in terms of him telling the world you are the best person to take over, it's well...it's fucking huge," Alec told her.
She sighed and then smiled sweetly when she spied Edward holding Emma as he talked to Rose and Alice. "His faith in me blows me away, but I am proud of the fact he thinks I can do it, and the rest of you, too. I'm honored actually, not that I even want to think about it, mind you."
Jasper had walked up and slung an arm around her shoulder and kissed her on the side of the head. "Darlin', I'm so proud of you. Though, if the time ever came, you have one less thing to worry about than before," he said with a glint in his eyes.
"Dude, what the hell are you talking about?" Alec asked.
Jasper motioned them both closer, though he hadn't moved his arm from around Bella. Conspiratorially he whispered, "I just heard from one of my buddies down at the Merc, Vincent is about to be voted out at Sinclair Publishing. Apparently the Board has caught wind of all the shady deals he's been involved in and he's overextended the company so much that the banks have started calling in their loans and there isn't enough money to pay them. More than likely Sinclair Publishing is going to have to file bankruptcy but Vince is definitely out as CEO."
"Fuck yeah, that bastard is getting what he deserved." Alec cackled gleefully and then crooked his eyebrow when he noticed the frown on Bella's face.
"Honey, what in the world is the matter with you?" he asked incredulously.
"All those poor employees," Isabella said immediately, thinking of all the people that would be without jobs once Sinclair Publishing filed for bankruptcy. All because of Vincent and his greed.
"And, that, Darlin', is why you are better than all of us put together. Only you would think of the people who worked for Vincent first," Jasper said and couldn't help but kiss her cheek again.
Isabella blushed, as she normally did when under such scrutiny, and then rolled her eyes at Jasper's comments. "Well, none of the people that work for Vincent should have to suffer for his mistakes, it's just a shame that's all."
"You don't fool me for a second, Isabella Cullen, if you could find a way to give every one of those people a job, you'd do it in a heartbeat," Alec told her and didn't even try to hide the adoration in his voice for his friend.
Isabella scoffed but as soon as she was about to say something she felt a tug on her hand and smiled when she saw it was Jack, dressed in his jersey from the Chicago Fire soccer game he'd attended with her, Edward, and Charlie. According to Rose he hadn't taken it off in the two days since they'd gone.
The game had been beyond fun, not just because the game itself was exciting, but because they all had enjoyed themselves so much. Charlie and Edward talked throughout most of the game, that was when Jack wasn't seated between the two of them soaking everything up. Edward had been adorable to the extreme as he peppered her with question after question about the mechanics of the game, along with asking her about her own memories from when she had played. He was totally enthralled and looked at her like he'd just discovered her secrets all over again. The questions continued long after they'd gotten home as she told him stories she hadn't thought about in years. Afterward, they had made love so tenderly that the memory brought tears to her eyes as well as making her wish they could hurry up and go home.
"Aunt Bella, can I have a piece of cake?" Jack asked and looked at her like she was the best thing since sliced bread. He loved his Uncle Edward and thought he was pretty cool, but his Aunt Bella, well the only people he loved more were his mom and dad, and in his way of thinking, they didn't count because they were, well, Mom and Dad.
"Sure thing, buddy. If you promise not to tell your mom, I'll even give you an extra big piece, okay?" Isabella said with a wink as she led him toward the tables where the food was spread out.
She got Jack his cake and then stood with him as he ate, asking about school and his next baseball game. She felt that tingling feeling she always got when Edward was either close by or looking at her and when she looked up, she lost her breath for a moment. He was still standing with Rose and Alice, but now also Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, and Jasper, and he was still holding Emma. He was holding her hand and they were waving at her, with silly smiles on their faces and she wasn't sure she'd ever seen a sweeter sight.
The next thought she had was that she couldn't wait until it was their son or daughter he held in his arms. Blowing a kiss at him, she vowed that they would indeed be practicing when they got home.
~~~~OOO~~~OOO~~~~


Tuesday, April 17, 2001

Chapter 25

~~~~OOO~~~~OOO~~~~
Chapter 24 Bonus Scene
Esme sighed and stared out the window, not really seeing what was passing her by. Santa Claus could go flying by on his sleigh and it wouldn't have even registered with her she was so lost in thought. Snippets of the evening's events played in her mind like a slide show, never staying on one thing too long, but certainly long enough to painfully pierce her heart. A heart she wasn't sure would ever mend fully, no matter how much time passed.
She wasn't sure which was worse or hurt the most, the fact that she had spent twenty years mourning a sister who was not the person she thought she was or the fact that Edward had suffered so much because of hers and Carlisle's misplaced guilt and jealousy. It was one in the same she supposed, and at this point did it even matter? The damage had been done and it was only by some miraculous turn of events, which she had yet to even begin to try to understand, that Edward had forgiven the two of them at all.
Isabella was the catalyst, she was sure of it, though she didn't know how or why, but there was no question that she was. Watching the way Edward drew strength from her, the way she surrounded him with so much love and total faith was astounding to watch, humbling, too, in all matter-of-fact. She and Carlisle loved each other, but not like they did. What Edward and Isabella shared with each other was awe-inspiring to witness, if not a bit intimidating.
She and Carlisle both, their whole family, owed Isabella so much. It was debt she was sure would never be able to be repaid.
She sighed again and heard Carlisle say softly, "Darling, are you all right?"
Not turning to look at him, for if she did she knew she would surely break down, she merely shrugged her shoulders and gave him some sort of noncommittal sound.
Would she ever be okay? As happy and relieved as she was to finally know everything, she wondered how they would move forward. How they would learn to be a family. How she could ever make up to Edward all the pain and suffering he'd endured because of them. It was like moving on after the death of a loved one she guessed, though when she was honest with herself, it was like a death; the death of the childlike fantasy of the memory of her sister. What happened to Maggie that made her treat her own child the way, or had she always been so utterly selfish and Esme just never admitted that?
Questions she wasn't sure she would ever have answers for or certainly not answers that made any sort of sense.
Carlisle was heartbroken as he continually watched Esme out of the corner of his eye. His thoughts were every bit as self-loathing as hers were, perhaps even more so. It wasn't a contest, but if it were, he was pretty sure causing pain due to your own jealousy and pride trumped the loss of a sister.
God, he felt like such a failure...as a son, a husband...a father. Listening to Edward talk tonight as he relived all of those painful moments was pure, unadulterated torture. Each word he spoke, each heartbreaking event that had taken place, Carlisle would think about and remember for the rest of his life. He deserved no less.
What he wouldn't give to go back and time and do everything, every damn thing, differently. Starting with the moment they arrived in Ireland and he first laid eyes on that broken, scared boy. He wouldn't ever forget how Edward looked when he and Esme had walked into that office and found him curled up in a chair, not speaking, and looking so lost and alone. How could he have ever thought he was okay, that he was coping? What a fool he had been, a blind, jealous fool. What kind of man puts his own selfish needs and wants ahead of a child's? After listening to Edward talk about his childhood in Ireland, he knew he was no better than Liam and Maggie; none of them deserved the incredible privilege of having a son like Edward.
The fact that Edward was willing to forgive him was testament to how good a man he was and if it took every day until the day he died, Carlisle vowed to never, ever forget it.
The rest of the drive was spent in complete silence because both of them were too consumed with their own feelings of guilt and unworthiness to try to comfort the other. When Carlisle pulled the car in their driveway and parked the car in the garage, they both sat, unmoving when he turned the car off. The silence that surrounded them was uneasy and tension-filled, so unlike the way it normally felt.
Carlisle briefly wondered if it would ever feel the way it used to again.
"Es, we need to go inside. It's too cold sit here like this," Carlisle said with a heavy sigh and pulled the keys out of the ignition.
She nodded at him and then opened her door, walking with lead feet inside. Normally her house was her refuge, the place she felt the safest, the most comfortable, but walking through tonight, she felt the weight of all her failures. It was in every picture that was displayed, because Edward wasn't in them. There were a few here and there, but not as many as of Emmett, or of Emmett and Rose, or of Emmett, Rose, Jack, and Emma. There were his graduation pictures, from high school and college, a picture of him and Isabella from their wedding, a few formal family pictures, but that was it. There weren't the scattering of spontaneous snapshots like there were with Emmett, pictures of happy times caught forever on film. No, the ones she had showed, in both color and stark black and white, just how far away he'd kept himself from his family...because he never felt like he was wanted.
That thought brought her to her knees and she finally let go, sobbing uncontrollably. Carlisle was beside her in an instant, crying right along with her. Where the tears came from Esme wasn't sure because she thought she'd cried them all out at Edward's but they just kept coming and coming in a steady stream. She held onto Carlisle as tightly as he held onto her hoping that somehow, someway, he could ease her pain, even though she knew he was hurting every bit as much as she was.
"Car, where do we go from here? How do we make it up to him?" she asked through her hiccups as she tried to catch her breath.
"We love him, Esme, and show him every day how much he means to us, the way we always should have," Carlisle answered and ran his fingers across her tear-stained cheeks.
He got up and pulled her along with him and the two made their way upstairs to their bedroom. They each quickly got ready for bed and in no time were wrapped in each other's arms. Neither spoke for a time, because words weren't needed in order to offer one another comfort. After so many years together they knew each other's bodies and thoughts as well as they knew their own
"I love you, Esme," Carlisle whispered in a hoarse, raw voice.
"I love you, too," she answered back, squeezing him tightly.
"I know it doesn't seem like it now, but we'll be okay. We'll make things right," he promised her with all the conviction he had.
Esme sighed and tightly closed her eyes before she opened them and looked at her beloved husband. He was not a perfect man, she'd always known that, but she loved him with a strength that left her breathless and weak in the knees even all these years later. He was her rock, her protector, and even though he took on that role with a vigor that often bordered on extreme, she wouldn't want him any other way.
The mistakes and failures concerning Edward notwithstanding, of course.
"How, Carlisle? How do we fix this? How do we earn his forgiveness?" she questioned plaintively.
"We try, Es, every damn day, to be the parents we should have been all this time. Me more than you; you've always let him know how much you've loved him, even if he didn't acknowledge it. Me? I've squandered away twenty years that I can't ever get back, but I can make sure to embrace this second chance he's given me and I fully intend to do just that," Carlisle told her as he cupped her cheek in his hand.
Esme would never blame him, just like he couldn't blame her, for the things that happened and the mistakes they'd made, so she didn't. Instead she said, "We owe Isabella so much."
"We do, though there isn't anything we could do that could repay her for what she's given us, or what he has either for that matter. They are two very remarkable people," he sighed.
Again neither spoke for a time and then he whispered, though he was fairly certain she was asleep, "Tomorrow is a new day, my love, and a new beginning for our family. We'll be all right, I promise."
He'd never meant anything more in his life.
~~~~OOO~~~~OOO~~~~
Now, on with TGG
Chapter 25
The following morning, Edward woke up with a smile on his face, a heart that was lighter than he could ever remember, and a tangled mess of brown curls tickling his nose.
It was the best way to wake up ever.
When Isabella sighed and then stretched against him as she woke up, rubbing a naked breast against his chest in the process, he quickly amended his previous thought. Though it was still a pretty damn good way to wake up, truth be told. She threw a leg over his and in doing so, the sheet slipped down around her leaving a very naked and very, very sexy hip and part of her ass exposed. He moaned, he thought quietly, but when he heard her raspy giggle, he knew she'd heard him.
"Sorry, sweetheart, but if we're going to make it to Mass on time, we need to get up and get going," she told him and then when she picked her head up after kissing his chest, she rolled her eyes when he pouted at her.
"You don't want to explain to Father O'Connor and Nonna why we're late, do you?" she teased.
"Hell no. Fine then, you can make me breakfast. I'm starving because someone thought it would be a good idea to keep me up until all hours of the night engaged in... strenuous activity." He smirked at her just a second before he rolled over on top of her.
Knowing that she still had a thing about kissing him in the morning without brushing her teeth first, no matter how many times he told her he loved kissing her first thing, he brushed his lips against hers before moving to the side of her neck. If he couldn't kiss her, nibbling and sucking on her neck wasn't a bad substitute.
At all.
"You know, you actually have to let me out of bed, Edward, if you want breakfast." She giggled when he shook his head, though he hadn't stopped what he was doing.
"Don't want you to go," he mumbled against her skin.
Just then both of their stomachs rumbled and he huffed before he rolled off her and threw himself back on his pillow.
"Fine, go fix us food, woman. Apparently I'm not the only one that worked up quite the appetite," he said with a grin.
She slid from the bed and threw a t-shirt on and without missing a beat, twisted a band around her hair to put it up in a ponytail. She knelt on the bed and leaned over, kissing him quickly on the lips. "Breakfast will be ready in about twenty minutes," she told him and then scooted back before he had time to grab her, which he'd had every intention of doing.
He watched her walk out the door of their room and groaned, loudly, when he realized she hadn't put any panties on. There was nothing that could have stopped the smile that blossomed on his face when he heard her laugh as she went down the stairs.
The woman knew exactly how to drive him crazy that was for sure.
He hopped out of bed and grabbed a clean pair of boxers so that he could take a shower. He had no doubt that there would be a visitor waiting in the chair in the corner when he was through, and when he walked out of the bathroom less than ten minutes later, he wasn't wrong.
"I don't suppose I need to ask how you are this morning, do I?" Seth taunted when Edward walked past him and into the walk-in closet to get dressed.
"Aren't you supposed to know everything?" Edward sarcastically responded a few moments later when he walked out of the closet wearing a pale yellow shirt and a bright, multicolored, polka dot tie.
Whatever smart ass retort Seth had for Edward was forgotten the moment he saw what his young friend was wearing. "Eddie, you never do anything halfway, I'll give you that," he said with a loud chuckle that shook the windows.
"Look who's talking," Edward gave back just as good when he looked pointedly at the shoes the angelic being had on.
Seth stuck out his leg and looked admiringly at his choice of footwear for the day. "What? These old things? You telling me you don't like them?" the angel questioned with a twinkle in his ice blue eyes. His feet were adorned with the most hideous gold-colored sneakers, and they had wings of all things if you can believe that, which if you knew the annoying angel, really made perfect sense. Show off.
Edward snorted as he walked to his dresser to grab his watch and wallet and said, "Not just no, but hell no. I swear I think you wear shoes like that just to see if you can get a rise out of me."
"Hmmm, wouldn't you like to know? Seriously, Edward Anthony, how are you this morning? Last night was quite the roller coaster for you, though I must say again, I am really proud of the way you handled everything," Seth said as he once again became guardian angel instead of pain in the ass angel.
Edward sat down on the edge of the bed and then looked at him. "I'm...good," he told Seth. "Really, really, good."
"Anything you want to talk about?" the angel questioned sincerely.
Quite honestly, poor Seth couldn't decide if he wanted that answer to be yes or no. As much as he had enjoyed and found great meaning in what he'd done to help Edward, he was rather looking forward to watching Edward...just be Edward.
Edward regarded the annoying angel person for a moment while he mulled over that question. There were still things he had questions about and one very important issue he was still struggling with, but for the time being if Seth wasn't going to push it, neither was he.
Apparently, because Seth seemed rather laid back at the moment, time was not of the essence, at least not for today. If that was the case, Edward had much better things to think about. If he was going to be allowed the freedom to do so, he was damn sure going to take it.
There wasn't any way of knowing how many days he had left so he was going to enjoy every one of them to the fullest.
Answering the question from a moment ago, Edward said, "No. I'm okay."
Both of them heard Isabella humming downstairs and Edward couldn't help but smile when Seth sighed as he looked in the direction of the kitchen. The angel didn't fool him for one second; he still ogled Isabella whenever he got the chance.
Turning back toward his charge, Seth rolled his eyes when Edward smirked at him. He didn't say anything, just merely shrugged his shoulders. It wasn't as if Edward wasn't fully aware of how incredible his wife was.
"Are you nervous about dinner tonight?" Seth questioned as he shifted the focus back to Edward and away from Isabella.
Not that he really wanted to, mind you.
Edward finished tying his shoes and then stood up after grabbing his suit jacket. Turning toward the angel he said, "No, not really. I know things are going to be tense for a while and I know things aren't fixed just because we've all said we're sorry. I'm still angry and hurt, but I also know that for my sake, as well for everyone else's, it's best not to dwell on things that happened in the past. Now that everything is out in the open, hopefully we can all learn how to act like a family."
Once again, the normally all-knowing angel was taken by surprise, though in all reality, he really shouldn't have been. Edward was much stronger than Seth had ever realized. Didn't mean Seth wasn't going to annoy him just because he could though.
Really, what kind of angel would he be if he let young Edward off that easily?
"Very well then. Enjoy Mass and then dinner with your family. I'll see you bright and early in the morning. Should be a fun day at Cullen Publishing tomorrow," the angel said with a mischievous grin and then was gone.
"Damn pain in the ass, know-it-all, wife-ogling angel," Edward muttered, though it was done with a smile.
He made his way down the stairs as quietly as he could because he had a detour he wanted to make before he went to find Isabella in the kitchen. He slipped out the back door and was taken aback at the riot of color in the garden. He hadn't been out here in a few weeks and he was amazed at how much it had changed. Between changing the bedrooms, Isabella's birthday and the opera, and then last week when he was in asshole mode, there hadn't been any time to relax back here like he and Isabella had started to do and he was surprised at how much he missed it.
Ever since that night all those weeks ago, and really, it seemed almost like a lifetime ago to him when he stopped to think about it, Edward made it a point to come outside with Isabella at least a few times a week. Sometimes their schedule prevented that, but as long as the weather held out it was something he really enjoyed. He loved watching her work with her plants and flowers, only because it was obvious how much she enjoyed it. It didn't hurt that she always wore a pair of jeans that hugged her ass just right either he noted with a smile.
Carefully plucking a perfect pale yellow hibiscus bloom from the bush, Edward took one last glance around the garden. He made a mental note to pick up some butter pecan ice cream so they could enjoy eating it outside this week and then hurried back into the house. Silently he entered the kitchen and stepped behind her, handing her the flower.
"It's not as beautiful as you, but I thought you deserved something pretty this morning," he whispered in her ear when he bent his head down. With his nose he nuzzled the side of her neck for a moment and then said, "It doesn't smell as good as you do either, Beautiful."
"Edward," she said breathlessly as she closed her eyes.
She leaned back against him, even though she knew she shouldn't, but it was just too big a temptation to resist. He was all hard muscles and smelled so damn good, and her body reacted unconsciously to being so close to him. She groaned softly when the hand that wasn't holding the flower slid from her hip across her stomach and held her in place as he shifted behind her ever so slightly, but it was just enough so that he was pressed firmly against her ass. She tipped her head to the side when she felt his tongue on the side of her neck and all thoughts of getting to Mass anywhere close to on time were about to be very quickly thrown out the window.
Until he stepped backward and took his hand away.
She stuck out her bottom lip when she turned around to face him, but as soon as she saw the way he was dressed and her smile on his face, she couldn't help but sigh.
He was so, so happy and it took her breath away.
She couldn't take her eyes off him, at least until he chuckled at her. "It's just me, love," he told her softly.
"I know. I plan on keeping this Edward for a really long time," she answered back. "Thank you for my flower."
He stepped forward and took it from her hands and then slid it behind her ear. "Like I said, it's not as beautiful as you, but I thought you would like it," he said with an adorable shrug of his shoulders.
"I love it." She stepped forward and kissed his cheek and then once again stepped back before he could hang on to her. They really were going to be late if she got sidetracked and with him looking the way he did and acting the way he was, it was taking every ounce of willpower she had not to attack him right there in the kitchen.
For so long she'd hoped and prayed that they would get to this place, that he would let her all the way into his heart and share every bit of himself, the good and the bad, with her and now that they had finally reached this point, well, it was a bit overwhelming to say the least. Like Edward had mentioned to Seth, she also knew that everything wouldn't be perfect overnight. There was a lot of healing that needed to be done, but the hardest part was over now.
"I love you," he said back and tried to reach for her, scowling when she shook her head at him.
"I love you, too, Edward, but I need to get dressed and you need to eat," she told him in the tone that let him know she meant business.
"Fine, fine, spoil all my fun," he tried to say with a straight face, but couldn't because just then his stomach growled.
He looked toward the table and his eyebrows rose all the way to his forehead, or at least it felt like it when he saw his laptop, already on and open, beside his plate. He looked back toward his wife with his mouth hanging open and before he could even say anything, she laughed at him.
"Sweetheart, I know you have things to check on at the office. I just figured you could do it while you ate, especially because we'll be busy most of the day."
"You...you're, damn I love you," he told her again and then hurried to sit down.
Now that he thought about it, he had a million and one things he needed to check on and was anxious to get to work, even though it would only be for a little bit.
"Eat, read your emails or whatever you need to do, and I'll be down in thirty minutes so we can go," she told him and kissed the top of his head because he'd already started pulling up his email as soon as he sat down.
She chuckled at him when she turned around to walk upstairs. She knew he'd been so focused on other things for the past few weeks and though he would never let the business suffer in any way, he did have a company to run and a snake named Vincent to deal with.
The sooner the better.
Walking into their bedroom, she couldn't help but smile at her husband's pitiful, but very sweet attempt to make their bed. He was as adorable and romantic as he could be, but the man couldn't make a bed to save his life. She quickly straightened out the sheets and the comforter and then put the pillows back in their designated places. She gently laid her flower on the bed and then wasted no time picking out a dress that would match.
While she was showering she thought about what tomorrow at the office would be like. As emotionally draining as the past week had been for her and for Edward as well, she couldn't wait to just move forward, with no secrets, no hidden hurts or memories between them and just be themselves.
She was rather excited and really looked forward to seeing how much better and stronger their relationship would be now that everything was out in the open. In all actuality, she couldn't wait.
While she was getting dressed and putting on her makeup, Edward was still busily going through his emails from work and making notes for the things he needed to take care of when he got to the office in the morning, starting with meeting with Jasper, Emmett, Alec, and Marcus and making an announcement that he would have Jasper draw up the proper paperwork to name Isabella, formally, as his successor. It was something he should have done a long time ago in the first place and it was, as Seth had made abundantly clear, imperative to have a plan in place, just in case.
He knew she wouldn't want a big deal made out of it, but he knew, and he was damn sure that the others would agree, that she more than deserved the recognition and he was going to talk to everyone to figure out what to do for her. Next on the list was tackling Vincent Sinclair and the mess he'd begun to make out of things. Isabella and Emmett's campaign had really taken off and was already the talk of the publishing world. In his in-box there were more messages than he'd been able to get to yet asking for interviews, appearances, and quotes for numerous newspapers and magazines. With each success and each accolade it seemed like Vincent had spiraled more and more out of control. It would be almost funny if it wasn't so tragic. There was no love lost between he and Vince but that didn't mean Edward relished watching him drive his family's company into the ground and along with it, the careers of everyone associated with him.
Yeah, he had a lot of work to do in the coming days and he was more than ready to tackle it all.
He looked up when he heard the sound of Isabella's shoes on the hardwood floor and thankfully for him, and his laptop, he'd already finished his breakfast or else he would have choked on his food when he saw her walk into the dining room.
"Beautiful...you're just...beautiful," he and then chuckled at his total loss for anything original.
He clicked the touch pad to turn off the laptop and then stood up, instantly taking her in his arms and then proceeded to kiss her until they were both panting for breath.
"We really have to go, Edward," she told him even though she had her arms wrapped around his neck.
"I know," he answered back even though he didn't stop kissing her neck. He was careful not to wrinkle her dress, but he was having a hard time, a really hard time, controlling himself right at the moment.
Finally he managed to pull himself away from her and when he did, he was able to appreciate seeing her all over again. "Isabella, baby, you really do look amazing," he said, and his voice was a delicious mixture of sexy and sweet and it made her heart race.
He continued to stare at her, taking note and smiling appreciatively when he noticed the flower in her hair. The dress matched the flower perfectly and if it fit her any better, he'd have to seriously consider bringing a baseball bat or something with him to church to beat off anyone that couldn't take their eyes off her, though he had to concede, that would be probably be just about everyone. She had her friendship bracelet on as well as a simple pair of platinum earrings and necklace with a diamond cross pendant. Her hair was down and hung in soft curls and as usual, she wore minimum makeup...because she didn't need it.
Of course staring at him and taking in the way he was dressed might have had a little bit to do with the rapid beating of her heart, or hell, a lot. He sure knew how to wear a suit well, she thought. He was the most gorgeous man she'd ever laid eyes on and he was totally, completely, and irrevocably hers, and he always would be.
With a sigh that indicated how conflicted she was, she told him they needed to go, again, and this time, thankfully, he nodded his head and led them to the car. The drive to meet the family at church was quick and filled with lighthearted small talk and both Edward and Isabella relished the fact that things were so much better, deeper, between them. Neither acknowledged it, but both could feel the subtle shift in their relationship.
When he parked and then got out to help her from the car, he couldn't help but give her a sexy smile when she stood up. The weather outside was absolutely perfect, sunny with just the slightest bit of chill in the air and when the sunlight bounced off her hair and the diamonds around her neck, it was almost as if heaven was shining down on her. A totally cheesy thought he knew, one which he blamed the annoying angel person for, but it didn't make it any less true either.
Just as he was about to step forward and kiss her, he heard the sweetest voice, besides Isabella's of course. "Uncle Ebbard!" Emma squealed as she let go of Rose's had and ran to him.
Edward turned from his wife and toward his niece, bending over to swing her up into his arms as soon as she was close enough. "How's my favorite pretty girl today?" He chuckled at her while she squeezed him around the neck.
"Good. Mommy let me pick out my dress today, isn't it pretty?" she asked him and giggled when he pretended to have to think about his answer.
"I dare say, Miss Emma, you will be the prettiest little girl in the whole church today," he answered and then gave her a raspberry on her cheek.
She squirmed as she tried to get away from him and then held his face in her tiny little hands and very seriously said, "I missded you."
Well, that melted Edward's heart and kind of made him feel like the luckiest guy in the world, which he pretty much thought he was anyway. "Missed you, too, angel. Want to sit with me during Mass?" he asked, not wanting to let her go.
"Can I, Mommy?" Emma asked when she turned toward Rose.
Rose rolled her eyes and tried to stop from smiling at how utterly adorable Edward was with her daughter but failed...miserably.
"Of course you can, baby girl. I see how it is," she teased.
Every member of the Cullen family had arrived and everyone that passed by couldn't help but smile at the group of them. They did indeed make quite the spectacle as they stood and talked with one another. It wasn't done on purpose of course, but that didn't mean it wasn't true just the same.
Charlie and Renée looked on as they waited for the rest of their suddenly much closer family to join them before they made their way inside the church. Charlie watched with a huge, proud smile on his face as Edward interacted with his family. He couldn't believe the changes in him; he seemed like a totally different man than the one he'd met all those years ago. And his daughter? Happy didn't even begin to describe her.
It did his heart good to see them so much in love.
The Swans greeted the Cullens warmly, though Carlisle and Esme were welcomed with a bit less enthusiasm than Emmett and his family. Charlie was still trying to come to grips with everything he'd heard last night and he had a lot of questions, though he would do as his daughter asked and give Edward time and space. Their relationship was such that he knew if Edward needed him, he would let him know.
Charlie couldn't even begin to describe, and he'd tried plenty to articulate it to Renée, how much it meant to him to have gotten as close as he had to Edward over the past month and a half. It honestly felt like it had always been that way, not just a recent development. It was one he hoped would continue to get stronger over time.
The impressive group finally made their way into the church and filled up an entire pew. Charlie proudly led the way, followed by Renée and then Nonna. Isabella sat beside her and Jack was happily between her and his Uncle Edward. Emma of course wouldn't let go and took her spot prominently on his lap. Esme scooted closer to Edward to leave room for Carlisle, Emmett, and then Rose.
Father O'Connor smiled from the altar when they'd all taken their seats. He'd been inordinately pleased when Edward showed up at Mass a few weeks ago with Isabella and he noticed as each week went by how much happier Edward seemed. He was a bit shocked to see Edward's family along with the Swans, especially because he couldn't recall seeing them since Emma was baptized.
Emma had fallen asleep contentedly snuggled up on her Uncle Edward's shoulder and didn't stir until they'd all stood up to leave once Mass was over. Sleepily, she reached her tiny hand out to touch the flower in her Aunt Bella's hair saying softly, "So pretty."
Isabella smiled at her and reached up and pulled the bloom from behind her ear and slid it behind her niece's ear. "It looks prettier on you than me, Sweet Pea," she said lovingly as she kissed her on the forehead.
"I'd beg to differ with you, love," Edward whispered to his wife with a smile.
He placed his hand on the small of her back so they could make their way outside. Jack had yet to let go of her hand and to anyone looking at them, they looked like a wonderfully happy and loving family. While that was true, it wasn't entirely accurate either, because Jack and Emma weren't their children and that thought caused Edward's heart to lurch almost painfully in his chest.
Oh, he'd come such a long way, cleared so many hurdles in the short time since the annoying angel person first appeared but the pain of all the regrets he had hadn't diminished at all. That was the thing about regrets Edward had come to know so well, they never went away, you just merely learned how to live with them.
He pushed those melancholy thoughts to the back of his mind as they walked out the doors and met the rest of the family outside. Charlie, Renée, and Nonna were chatting with some friends and Father O'Connor was speaking with his parents and Em and Rose.
"Edward, Isabella, it is so wonderful to see the rest of your family with you this morning," the vivacious priest greeted them as he hugged them both.
"Thank you, Father," Isabella said, and Edward noted she blushed, just like she always did whenever she spoke to the good-looking priest.
It was a fact that Edward and Charlie had laughed about more than a few times because both Renée and Nonna had the same reactions whenever Father O'Connor was around them. The Irish priest was a charming man; even Edward had to give him credit for that.
"Well, I see you've reacquainted yourself with my parents and brother and sister-in-law, but let me introduce you to the other two members of my family," Edward told him and shifted Emma in his arms.
"Pretty girl, can you say hi?" Edward asked her softly as she picked her head up. "Father, this beautiful little girl is my niece, Emma, and this is her brother, Jack," he finished and laughed when Jack stuck his hand out to greet him properly.
"Well, aren't you two the best-looking of the whole bunch?" he teased and then proceeded to shake Jack's offered hand before rubbing his hand on Emma's back.
"Edward, my son, I must say, you look very comfortable with that beautiful little girl in your arms, perhaps you and Isabella will have at least one of your own soon."
The comment was meant to be lighthearted but Isabella couldn't help but frown when she saw the devastated look on Edward's face. It was gone almost before she could register what she'd seen, but she did see it and would be definitely asking him what that look was for.
Edward chuckled, somewhat nervously, and responded, "Well, we can always hope, can't we?"
The awkward moment seemed to pass when Charlie thankfully approached them all to say goodbye.
"Charlie, Edward and Isabella are coming to our house for dinner this evening and we would love it if you all could join us as well," Esme said once Father O'Connor walked off.
Esme had noticed both last night and this morning how at ease Edward was around Charlie, Renée, and Nonna. Admittedly, she was both happy and a bit hurt by that at the same time, only because it just reinforced, in her mind at least, how distant Edward had truly been from them. It was easy to see how much Isabella's family loved Edward and as she vowed to Carlisle last night, they would be doing everything in their power to do the same, to both Isabella and Edward.
Renée had stepped up beside her husband and linked her arm in his. She looked at Esme and gave a genuine smile. Like Charlie, she had many questions for Edward and her daughter, but would wait until a bit more time had passed before pressing for answers. She appreciated the gesture of being asked to dinner, but she intuitively knew Edward needed some time with his family. Isabella didn't get her gift of perception just from her father or her Nonna.
"Thank you, Esme, for the offer," she said before Charlie could say anything, "but, Charlie has promised to help me at the art studio this afternoon and then he's taking me to dinner, so perhaps we can do it another time. It was wonderful to have you all here with us today. We would love for you to come again."
She meant it, too. Like her daughter and her husband, there were some lingering feelings of disappointment, she supposed was the right word, as well as a bit of anger toward Esme and Carlisle for hurting Edward, but based on the fact they were all together this morning, she assumed there had been a resolution to most of their problems the night before. If that was truly the case, she wanted to do all she could to turn over a new leaf and move forward.
They were all family after all.
"We would love to, Renée," Esme said gratefully.
There was still so much to work through and to come to terms with, Esme thought with a heavy heart, but it certainly appeared as if everyone was willing to let bygones be bygones. There weren't enough words to describe how grateful she was for a second chance to show Edward how much he'd always meant to her.
After a round of goodbyes and promises to get together soon, the Swans left and the Cullens headed toward the parking lot. Emma still hadn't moved from her spot in Edward's arms. Jack, now he was a whole different story. Before Charlie had left, he'd reminded Edward and Bella of the upcoming soccer game and when Isabella asked Jack if he'd like to go with the three of them, the poor boy looked like he was either going to faint or explode right there on the spot. Edward and the others couldn't help but laugh at his excitement and if he had looked at his Aunt Bella like she was the coolest thing ever before, now she was right up there with his love for the White Sox which meant he reallllyyyy loved her!
Edward got an idea while they walked to the parking lot and called for his brother, "Hey, Em. Why don't you trade cars with me and let me and Isabella take the kids for the afternoon? We'll bring them back when we see you at dinner later."
Jack nodded his head enthusiastically and Isabella voiced her wish to do the same. Emma, well, because she hadn't let go of her Uncle Edward in over an hour now, it seemed like she was of the same opinion as her brother.
Emmett looked at Rosie, who had the same astonished look on her face that he assumed he had on his. First, Edward never, ever, let anyone drive his car. He assumed Isabella had occasionally, but it sure as hell wasn't something Edward ever did unless it was completely necessary. Second, Emmett was positive that Edward had never volunteered to babysit for an entire afternoon before and third, he would get a few hours of completely uninterrupted alone time with his wife; an opportunity he was most definitely not going to pass up.
"Hell yeah, man, that would be...I'm sure the kids would love it," Emmett said and then winced when Rose slapped his arm.
"Em, you're still at church! Watch the language!" she said with a huff and then turned to look at Edward and Isabella.
"If you guys are sure you're up for it, I think it would be great for the kids to spend the day with you," she told them both sincerely.
Luckily, Rose was one of those moms that was always prepared, so the kids had a change of clothes in the car so they weren't spending the day dressed in their Sunday clothes. After she and Isabella took the kids into the bathroom, Edward and Emmett traded keys. Emmett couldn't help but lick his lips when he eyed Edward's car. It wasn't often that Emmett got the chance to indulge in his love of driving fast and he had every intention of doing so the moment he got behind the wheel of that fine-looking piece of machinery.
"Just get it back to me in one piece, please," Edward said somewhat nervously as Emmett snatched the keys from him and dropped the keys to his Mercedes SUV into his brother's hand.
"Yeah, yeah," he said, not taking his eyes off the car.
Edward turned when he heard the sounds of the kids pulling Isabella by the hand toward the car and he slapped his brother on the back. "Have a good day, Em. We'll see you at dinner."
Emmett managed to tear himself away from staring at the car long enough to kiss his kids once they were buckled in their car seats and then hugged Isabella quickly. "You guys have fun today, and thanks, Bella."
"You're welcome, but this was all Edward's idea," she told him and then the two of them turned and smiled at each other as they watched Rose give Edward a list of instructions for the day.
"He's just...he's...I can't believe..." Emmett struggled to find the words to say and Isabella wrapped her arm around his waist and said softly, "I know, Em. He's incredible."
"You're not so bad yourself, sis," he told her as he kissed the top of her head.
There was a lot he wanted to say to both of them but it wasn't the time or the place, especially when he had a fucking kick ass car to drive and a hot wife to...well do things to he shouldn't think about standing outside a church.
"Babe, kiss the kids and let's roll." He smirked as he shook the keys in his hand and laughed heartily when he saw Edward swallow nervously. "Don't worry, bro, I promise to get it back to you in one piece."
"You'd better or it's your ass," Edward teased and then reached for Isabella's hand, sighing as soon as her fingers entwined with his. "You kids have fun, now," he told Em and Rose with a wink and then led Isabella to the passenger side of the SUV.
Once he got in his seat and adjusted the mirror, he heard Emmett peel out of the parking lot like a teenager and instead of growling, he laughed at his younger brother.
"You are a brave man, my husband," Isabella told him with a smile as they took off. "Spending the day with Jack and Emma and letting Em drive your car, it's like a whole new Edward."
"Actually, love, it's just the real Edward...finally. Hope you like him," he said quietly as he reached for her hand. His tone was teasing, but there was most definitely an undercurrent of uncertainty mixed in there as well and Isabella couldn't help but laugh tenderly at him.
"Oh, Edward, believe me, you have absolutely nothing to worry about in that department; like doesn't even come close to describing what I feel for you. However, I have a feeling that I'll have to fight the women off even more than I already do at the office tomorrow," she told him with a bit of a huff.
He chuckled at her, though he couldn't deny how much her words affected him. Not the part about the women at the office, because he never really paid attention to stuff like that anyway, but the part about what she felt for him. That stuff he did pay attention to, always. If she felt what he did, and he knew she did, they would make everyone sick by lunchtime with how much they felt for one another.
He kind of couldn't wait for that.
It was really pretty fucking amazing, he thought as he held onto her hand and listened to the kids chatter in the back seat, how much different things seemed to be, pretty much overnight. Granted, he'd changed the moment the infernal angel popped into his life. It also kind of went without saying that he wouldn't be driving in a car on a sunny Sunday morning with his beautiful wife and niece and nephew if the annoying being hadn't saved him in the first place.
And he truly did mean saved in every sense of the word.
One look out of the corner of his eye was all it took to realize just how much he owed Seth. The past few weeks had been the best of his entire life, but when he woke up this morning he couldn't help but hope the following ones, no matter how many they consisted of, would be even better. To finally be at this place was more than he ever dreamed, but it was no less than what Isabella deserved.
"What do you think we should do today?" Edward asked with a grin.
"This was your idea, sweetheart, what did you have in mind when you asked Em if we could keep the kids?"
Adorably, he shrugged his shoulders. "I have no idea to be honest with you. I just...I thought it would be nice to spend the day with you and them. It's such a pretty day outside," he trailed off, sounding almost embarrassed.
Totally unlike the Edward Cullen everyone else knew.
Thankfully, Isabella had a few ideas, starting with having lunch. "Why don't we take them to that pizza place where we can eat and then let them play some games. Then we can go the park and have some ice cream before we head to your parents' house."
Edward sucked in a breath at the mention of the word parents, but he recovered quickly. It would take a bit to get used to referring Carlisle and Esme as Dad and Mom, as his parents, even though they had been for more than twenty years now. Now that he'd let go of his past and was working on letting Liam and Maggie rest in peace, he had a feeling lots of things would be changing. He wasn't sure there was anything wrong with that.
"Sounds perfect, Beautiful. Do you think I can keep up with them?" he asked with a wink as he pulled in the parking lot of the pizza restaurant.
"I think number one, you can do anything you want to do and number two, it's good practice wouldn't you say?" she teased and then caught that same crestfallen look pass quickly over his face, and again, it was gone almost as quick as it came.
He flashed her a quick smile and then they made their way inside the very crowded restaurant and Isabella didn't have time to think about anything other than making sure Jack and Emma didn't get lost amongst the crowd of people in the game part of the family restaurant.
They spent almost two hours there eating and playing and Edward had never had more fun. Well, that was not quite true and he still couldn't play video games worth a damn, but he did enjoy just letting loose and enjoying himself.
Finally, they managed to wrangle the kids away from the games and got them buckled in the car and they headed for the park that was back in Evanston. The ride would take almost an hour because Edward would be sure to drive as close to the speed limit as he could and before long, both kids were asleep in the back.
Edward and Isabella could have filled their time talking, especially because there were still many things to talk about, but instead, they spent most of that time in a comfortable silence. The kind that only came from being totally secure and safe and loved.
Edward reached over and took her hand, taking a moment to run his finger along the friendship bracelet on her wrist and said, "You're my best friend, Isabella. I hope you know that."
He had no idea where that thought came from or why he said it after they hadn't said anything for at least twenty minutes, but the moment the words were out, he was happy he'd said them, especially when he saw the brilliant smile on her face.
"You're mine, too," she answered him back and lifted his hand to her mouth so she could kiss the back of it.
They didn't say anything else for the rest of the ride to the park and by the time Edward parked the car, both Jack and Emma woke up from their short nap and were raring to go. The park was the same one where Jack played baseball, so both kids took off running without even looking back once they got out of the car.
Edward grabbed Isabella and pulled her against him, keeping his arm wrapped tightly around her shoulder. In turn, she wrapped her arm around his waist as they walked toward the playground where Jack and Emma were already playing. There was a bench off to the side and Isabella started to walk toward it but Edward shook his head at her and then led her to the swings.
"Come on, love," he said with an irresistible grin as he held the side of a swing out to her so she could sit.
Isabella gaped at him but couldn't help but giggle at how utterly adorable he was. He'd taken off his suit jacket and tie, he'd shed them before they'd even had lunch, and had rolled up the sleeves of his shirt leaving his very sexy forearms uncovered. The sun was shining brightly and as he stood there and the sun bounced off the riotous mess of bronze hair on his head, she was almost rendered speechless by how beautiful he truly was.
Inside and outside.
The swing set was situated in a pit of soft sand so Isabella kicked off her shoes and sat down on the proffered swing. She glanced quickly toward the play structure and laughed at Emma trying to chase Jack across a rope bridge. They would be occupied for some time, she was sure, and before she knew it, could feel Edward begin to gently push her forward.
Neither spoke for another few moments, each totally lost in the comfortable peace and contentment that surrounded them now. Isabella gave way to the gentle swaying back and forth of the swing and enjoyed the feel of the warm sun on her skin. Fall would be approaching soon and days like this would be nonexistent until Spring. More than enjoying the beautiful weather, she enjoyed Edward's soothing and calm presence. If someone would have told her some six odd weeks ago that she would be here, that they would be at this point in their marriage, she would have looked at them like they had two heads. She could admit now, now that they had come together as they had, that there was a part of her that always feared Edward would never be able to face his past or that he would be able to love her as freely and openly as he did now.
And oh, Lord, how he loved her.
She was positively giddy on the inside and found herself overtaken by butterflies in her stomach more times than she could count when she thought about how much he loved her. Little things, like the flower this morning, or the sweet text messages he would send her throughout the day, and even the briefest of touches sent her heart soaring and her mind spinning.
"What are you thinking about?" he asked softly.
He'd been watching her the entire time he'd been pushing her and when the small but very sweet smile graced her beautiful face he felt a smile spread across his as well.
She looked up at him, squinting against the sunlight and said simply, "You."
Edward felt his lips form into the sexy, lazy smirk that his wife loved so much, even though at times it aggravated her to no end, and then said, "There could be worse things, I suppose."
The words were spoken casually, but inside Edward couldn't deny how much her words affected him. Though there was little these days that Isabella did that made him not want to bust out and sing cheesy love songs from the top of his lungs.
"Hmmm," she said back and then giggled when he growled behind her.
They each looked up when Emma's unmistakable peal of laughter floated through the air and when the beautiful little girl waved at them both, they each laughed at her.
Isabella was immediately reminded of what happened earlier in the day and was about to ask Edward about it when he asked, "Does it make you sad that we don't have a child?"
His stomach twisted painfully and as soon as the words left his mouth he wished he could take them back. Well, that wasn't one hundred percent honest, but he'd never intended to broach the subject blurting out a question like that seemingly from nowhere. The question had been weighing heavily on him though, there was no doubt about that. All morning at church as he held Emma in his arms, he couldn't help but picture a little girl with a head full of curly brown hair and eyes as green as his or a little boy that had his hair but Isabella's bottomless coffee-colored eyes.
Now that the question had been thrown out there, his mind raced as he fought the conflicting feelings that suddenly appeared. On the one hand, he wanted it with an almost alarming intensity. He wanted to share himself with Isabella in the most profound and intimate of ways and on the other...well, there was that whole he could die at any time thing going on.
He had been warring with himself for weeks now; at night when he held her sleeping form in his arms as he absentmindedly kissed the top of her head or during the ride to and from work on the days Peter drove him, even during meetings that seemed to go on and on, he thought about it. Having a child with Isabella was something he'd never allowed himself to want, but want it he did.
Desperately so in all matter-of-fact.
And therein lay the problem. Wanting it like he did, and he wanted it more and more every day, made him feel so incredibly selfish. How could he possibly justify having a child with Isabella, no matter how badly they both wanted it, not knowing if he'd even be alive when the baby was born? Time was an ever-elusive concept for most people under the best of circumstances; in his, well it was literally like a ticking bomb, one that could go off when he least expected it and rip him away from everything and more importantly everyone he loved.
Isabella.
She was the center of his universe and like he'd told her innumerable times, his everything. There wasn't anything he wouldn't do for her, nothing he wouldn't give her if it was within his power to do so and if she wanted a baby, how could he refuse her? No matter how uncertain his future was, could he really deny her the gift of a baby, one that was a perfect mixture of him and her, even if he wouldn't be around to enjoy it?
The answer, of course, was a resounding, unequivocal no.
Not just no, but hell no.
All of those thoughts took barely more than a few moments so when Isabella answered, "Sometimes," Edward realized he hadn't even stopped pushing her on the swing.
She heard him suck in a sharp breath and she turned her head quickly. "Edward, stop," she told him when she could practically see his mind whirring and she could definitely see the furrow in his brow.
He looked so sad at that one word that she knew she needed to explain her answer and fast. She reached up and grabbed his hand and pulled him around so that he could sit on the swing next to her. A small part of her recognized how strange it probably looked for them both to be sitting on swings meant for children, but she didn't have time to dwell on it.
"Beautiful, I..." Edward stammered, having no idea at all what he was trying to say.
She reached for his hand and slid her fingers in between each of his and he immediately took a deep breath before he faced her. "That was probably not the best answer I could have given you even though it's true," she told him once she looked at him. At the pained look on his face she squeezed his hand and then said softly, "Sweetheart, how could I not want a baby with you? You are the love of my life and I want nothing more than to have a family...our family. Up until very recently, no matter how badly I wanted it, have always wanted it, it just wasn't possible. You were in no way, shape, or form ready for such a thing and it would have been wholly unfair to pressure you or even ask you to bring a baby into our lives."
"And now?" he questioned in a voice that was just a hint above a whisper.
"We are in a much better place, wouldn't you say?" she asked just as softly.
He pulled their joined hands until her swing moved next to his and then he held her there. "I want to give you everything, Isabella. I just don't..." he said and then swallowed.
"Edward, I'm not telling you I want to have a baby tomorrow, but things are so much better between us now. I can't imagine not starting a family with you," she told him and then reached up and ran her fingers through his hair with the hand he wasn't holding.
He didn't want to do it, but he knew he had to ask the question that had been plaguing him for weeks now. If he didn't there wasn't any way he could even think about having a baby, no matter how much he wanted it. "Can I ask you a hypothetical question?" He was skirting that gray area of not being honest with her, but there was no way he could do anything but be somewhat vague. "If something happened to me, say while you were pregnant, and I wasn't able to be with you, would you still want a baby?"
Isabella's eyes went as wide as he'd ever seen them and he saw them frantically search his face for some hidden clue. After a moment when she'd came to some silent conclusion she answered him. "I can't...don't want to think about something happening to you, Edward. I can't even picture my life without you in it; it hurts too badly to even imagine such a horrible thing," she said shaking her head and tried to keep from bursting into tears at just the merest thought of somehow being without him.
"Love, I'm sorry," he tried to backtrack but damn, he really, REALLY needed her to answer that question.
She took a deep, shuddering breath and realized he was asking for a reason. She assumed it probably had something to do with that mysterious plane ride all those weeks ago so she should answer his 'hypothetical' question as best she could, no matter that just thinking about it made her sick to her stomach. "But, to answer your question, yes, I would still want to have your baby, even if some cruel twist of fate took you away from me. I would always have a part of you with me that way," she said and practically choked on the tears that she tried to keep at bay.
Edward couldn't stop the smile that spread across his face and it only fell a bit when he saw how upset she was. Trying to lighten the mood, he pulled her even closer to him and bent forward to nuzzle the side of her neck below her ear. "Does that mean, Beautiful, we can start practicing? Because, you know," he whispered in a silky smooth voice laden with need, "I'm a total believer in the old adage of practice makes perfect."
She couldn't help but giggle at him. "Yes, I'm quite sure you are."
They both looked up when Emma called for her Aunt Bella because she had to go potty and after telling her to wait just a second, Edward slid off the swing to his knees so he could put Isabella's shoes back on. Once he buckled the second shoe he pulled the swing forward before she could get off it and pressed his lips to hers.
He didn't give it a second's thought that they were in the middle of the park or that it was the middle of the day; all he could think about was how much he loved her and needed her and wanted her...and...and...and...a hundred other things.
His tongue obviously missed being inside her mouth because it had been hours by this point and it tangled and swirled in her mouth like he hadn't kissed her in days or weeks instead of just hours. He groaned in the back of his throat and the vibrations made him grip her hips and pull her even closer. He was about to wrap her legs around him, dress be damned when Emma's sweet voice penetrated through the thick haze of lust he currently found himself in.
"Practice, lots and lots of practice," Isabella panted as she tried to catch her breath.
"I love you, so fucking much, Isabella," he told her as he stared into her eyes.
She gazed back at him, looking deep into his eyes, and then whispered, "I love you, too."
He stood up and dusted off his knees and then helped her up before he kissed her one more time on the lips and then swatted her ass as she walked toward the kids to take them to the bathroom.
As he watched them all walk away, Isabella in the middle holding each of their hands, he smiled.
He hoped there was enough time, because if there was, they were going to have a baby.
~~~~OOO~~~~OOO~~~~